Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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