seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
