dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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