I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
