Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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