what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
