yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
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I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
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Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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