She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
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