I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
