i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.