This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
