He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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