hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
