Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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