i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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