We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I understand Curling. That high.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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