Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
