did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
