She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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