I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
