im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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