At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
