My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
