she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
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