Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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