is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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