I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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