just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
