its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
sex in a hospital.. check
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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