i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
