Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
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He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
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i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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