but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Randomize
