guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You were trust falling into bushes
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Randomize
