i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
