My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
