Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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