this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
