I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
