if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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