Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
