I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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