Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
