I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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