How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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