i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
