My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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