moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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