I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
