i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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