Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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