I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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